Of addiction and plans concerning it

Here I am. Waiting. Waiting to find something that'll make me smile in the morning. Waiting to forget this disillusioned state. Waiting for you to come back into my life. But more than anything,

Waiting for the 124th episode of bleach to load on friggin youtube.

There has to be something wrong when the first window (i.e. part one of the episode) loads slower than the second. the first part hasnt quite finished loading the theme song (which though pretty isnt why Im watching the thing) while the second part is roughly one third done. And we all know that theres no point in watching the 2nd if you havent watched the first. (well there is a point I suppose but the accompanying frustration greatly outweighs whatever that would be so there you have it.) The internet gods are teasing me again.

Sigh. it seems that i have an addiction. I never figured myself as the addict type but oh well. Statement of the marginally obvious aside (who watches 124 episodes and gets worked up enough to blog about waiting for said episode to load if not a member of the addicted?) I have learned something that any self respecting addict (not really ironic) has carved in the depths of their soul. The burden of feeding your addiction. Its rather hard work if I do say so myself. Granted its harder work weaning yourself off of any given addiction than feeding it but thats a different matter as of the moment.

(progress report: window 1: 1 cm. window 2: 5 cm )

The smokers, drinkers and druggies of the world are probably making derisive noises at this point in time. True enough, I'm not what you'd call a hard core addict but its basically the same principle. Heck I even have withdrawal symptoms. No I do not break out in a cold sweat, get the shakes or become insanely paranoid (the last one might have some lee-way but Im more or less insane and a half shade of paranoid on my good days so it doesn't really say much) I do however become very irritable and refuse to do any homework until I've had my "fix" and considering that I ran out of episodes from the home stash (i.e. the episodes saved in mylene's computer) about monday evening, I'd like you to make an educated guess as to the amount of homework I've accomplished this week. If you're using a number scale, let me give you hint: Its a very small number.

(progress report: window 1: 3 cm. window 2: 3 cm from end)

And so, as addicts are prone to doing, I have plopped myself down and am paitently (more or less... dammit load already...) feeding my addiction. However this is the means to an end. I know that its not a particularly good thing, well, strictly speaking not a good thing at all; this addictive behaviour. Thus, me being the good little girl that I am, I have decided to beat the addiction! How you ask? Simple. By feeding it til it dies. You think I'm stupid don't you? Haha... but what am I really? Stupid? or Brilliant??! I say brilliant!!!

(progress report: window 1: 3 cm. window 2: finished)

I will feed the addiction until there is nothing left to feed it i.e. I finish the series, thus with the closure from this, the addiction will die of its own accord being highly specific in nature (I am addicted to a particular series after all). This method obviously wouldn't work for say, a smoker or a drug addict. You can hardly smoke everything in your immediate vicinity and have your addiction die like mine for 2 rather obvious reasons. The first being that you'd probably die before smoking everything in the area, and 2, theres a fresh supply of things to smoke (or shoot up or drink or snort, whatever you want to use to be politically correct) coming your way every day. It becomes clear that this method is only applicable to my particular situation and is as such highly tailored in accordance with the circumstances.

Told you it was brilliant.

lolz... Seriously though I'm just bullshitting you :) and killing time until the friggin thing loads already. Like I said at the beginning of the post Im just waiting:
But more than anything, Waiting for the 124th episode of bleach to load on friggin youtube."

(progress report: window 1: finished. window 2: finished quite some time ago)

let the feeding begin :)