Semi-emo analogy...

... taken from something I scribbled during a particularly dull moment in my mind-blowingly boring history class last week-->probably explains the emoness :P

The transfer of affections is a peculiar process that though abrupt in many ways is, in others, painfully slow.

There's a bright, shiny new toy in the nursery. A velveteen rabbit; still soft and immaculately clean,with both button eyes, securely fastened and peering out brightly at the world. Untouched, and still awe-inspiring. New and improved. On the other side of the room lies the ratty old teddy bear with its thick outer coat of dust, and its stuffing peeping through embarrassing tears. Loved to bits and so battered that it's held together only by the soft bits of the love that had worn it down in the first place.

Eyes clear, with an innocent sincerity, the perfect shy smile, and a shared quirky passion. He has never let me down, never driven me to rage, never hurt me. My velveteen rabbit is more perfect than you could ever be. But all this pales in the memories of the warmth of your embrace. My heart turns to face a new exciting love, but even as I turn away from you, a certain proximity exists and the ties of old remain strong--see through but strong.

The velveteen rabbit sits prettily, on display atop the shelf. I feast my eyes upon it and clutch the battered teddy bear to my chest: not quite detached enough to put the old one in storage and not quite brave enough to dirty the new one with my fingerprints.

Am I really...

that taggable?? -.-' for those of you who actually bother to read the tiny blurb bit: Don't bother opening this, it's another tag post.

5 Random things you might not have known about me:

*I've recently taken to memorizing the opening/ending themes of anime that I really like. Not all of them obviously, I'm not that depraved.. *defensive* lol... My repotoire includes some of the themes from Bleach, Ouran high, Junjou Romantica (do not watch this. just listen to the theme songs...dili ko mu-elaborate...) Kyou Kara Maoh, Deathnote etc...

*Chinese food doesn't taste right to me unless I use chopsticks. Don't ask. I wouldn't be able to explain why.

*Bananas are my favorite fruit. It stems way back into my monkey child days. :P Particularly enjoyable when eaten with peanut butter (also a childhood favorite)

*I use sleep as a defense mechanism. When I don't feel well my body shuts down so I don't have to feel the pain. It's like anesthatizing myself. This is why I like sitting in the backseat, specifically by the window. In case of motion sickness it's easier to konk out.

*I have the strange habit of rereading the things I write (sometimes several times). Particularly the char things. Sometimes I'm surprised (not always pleasantly) that all that came out of me. *Thinks to self... how'd I come up with this sh*t?*

Tagged by Miss Zaki into posting 5 random things about myself... but I refuse to spread the "love" *staples a warding symbol for the tagging gods on dorm door* :P mleh.

Happenings...

in my life the past 3 weeks

-Celebrated my oldness with some friends
I turned 18 on the 11th. It was kinda terrible though. Mrs. Antonia Santos, my 166 teacher, managed to bludgeon my love for history into an unfeeling pulp with her epic levels of boringness. I spent the better part of the day running around from department to department trying to fix my whacked up schedule (7.5 straight hours of classes every Tuesday cannot go unfixed). I got rained on. I had a 6-9 class, and some crazy Arab beat up someone I know. But when I got back to the dorm, tired and disgruntled, my dorm mates made it all better :) We had pizza, laughed and mucked around like we did in first year, and I got a surprise birthday cake. That last hour completely made up for the previous 15. :) (thank you to: Mylene, Crissy Pami, Tara, Joan, Janet, Claire, Dane, Jaki, Jo and Drea)

As funky as my actual birthday was, was just as great as my "debut" was. Logistics, and well, yeah, haphazard planning on my part, prevented me from bringing all my friends along (sorry scihi people : /)but it was a blast anyway. I was kinda worried at first since the group was composed of people from my different factions of friends i.e. they didn't know each other. O.o but after a day of ice skating, great food and even better conversation, my disparate group of friends.. became friends. And I really can't properly explain how happy that made me. but I was so happy that I was kinda out of it in the van on the way home. *turns to Tara at the back of the van* "Thank you for being my estrogen friend!!" ... yeah... :) I couldn't have asked for a better debut. (Thank you to: Tara, Beagle, Trish, RJ, Miggy, Fred, Chris, Yul, Anjo and Harvey-who popped up with Anjo but who I'm glad was there anyway)

The happiness continued on after that :P after dropping everyone off at Ateneo, Miggy, RJ, Trish and I, with the addition of Howie who we grabbed from Cervini on our way back out, headed to Miggy's house in Susana Heights for a night of DnD! The first session I've played in over a year. We were using the new 4.0: uber noob friendly and super fun. See our illustrious DM RJ's blog for details http://voynich.multiply.com/journal/item/101/Castle_Ruthven_Campaign_First_Session_Results And to cap it off, on the way back to the dorm with Trish, I got myself the latest Discworld novel in all its pretty paperback glory. Making Monet by Terry Pratchett. I haven't read it yet (so many things to read for SCHOOL!! ggaaaaahh! *drowns in photocopied readings*) but it's sitting prettily on my shelf... tempting me...

speaking of school though..
-So far, I've done caricatures of 5 of my 6 teachers
I'm just missing my Philo prof sir Pasco :D I don't think I'll be drawing him any time soon though. I can't afford to break concentration long enough to draw him because dude, its PHILO. and It's not just philo (usually that probably wouldn't be a problem), it's in TAGALOG O.O Whhuuut??! Yes, I am taking Philosophy 101 in Tagalog. If Sir Pasco wasn't so cool I'd be falling through the void in the abyss of utter despair right now. As it stands I'm having fun in his class. :)

-Discovered that my French Accounting classmate is a tard-face
He was my seatmate on the first day and looked terribly lost, what with all the people around him already engaged in conversations. So, being me, I wanted to be nice... and ended up making an ass out of myself trying to be friendly. when class was over he left without a word. This week, I helped him with the seatwork Sir Lim left us before leaving for his date (yes, our accounting prof has a social life which means we usually get off a little earlier. God bless him. :D) and not a word of thanks. I'm so glad Crissy took his place as my seatmate. I wouldn't want to get in trouble with the French Embassy for braining one of their citizens with a 2 inch thick cost accounting book.

-Did well on our first chinese oral exam
Yeay chinese 2! This dialogue was supposed to revolve around basic math in chinese...which is friggin hard. You have to translate the chinese into numbers, solve the problem, and re-translate the answer into chinese. your using the different halves of your brain for that too.. stress on the corpus collosum much :| but we did alright :) possible A? haha ;p

-Have been turned into the personal assistant of my PolSci professor
He has me hunting for books by Barack Obama. *phone rings late at night*
Me: "Uh, Hi Sir, what is it?"
Sir : "I was wondering if you could borrow these books..."
Me: "Oh, ok. By when should I have the photocopies for class?"
Sir: "Oh no, these are for my personal use."
Me: "Ah..."

-Joined 5 orgs
Yeaaaahhh.. I might have been a little overzealous with the sign-ups :P but I really do want to be active in all of these orgs (impossible as that is) I joined:
*Celadon- I'm a comm and pub project manager this year (for the art workshop)
*Apart- visual arts collective
*FAS- Freelance Art Society
*CAPES- Comic Appreciation Publication and Education Society
*Toujin- basically an anime club :P
I see a pattern... hahaha. I've really gotten into drawing again (looks at the list of orgs.. no shit Sherlock...) and progress has been made if I do say so myself. I've still got a lot to learn but hey, I'm actively pursuing something that makes me happy :)

So yeah, my heavily edited, 3 weeks in a nutshell. I have backlog, my corner of the world has gained the resemblance of a war zone again and I'm basically an insomniac but all in all the past 3 weeks have been good, and I just expect it to get better. :)





Optimistic me is back ;P

How much do you know...

...about the strange and elusive creature known as the Gani bear?

I find it funny when people say that I'm really popular and have a buttload of friends. I don't think I have that many friends at all. not real ones anyway :P So, since I'm bored and this looks potentially amusing... here we go :) Are you my friend or lumped under friendly acquaintance?


Create your own Friend Test here

http://www.truefriendtest.com/friendtest/1806059

Can you hear...

...stole this from my friend RJ. It's kinda like that game I played with Anjo, Tara and Magsy on one of our spur of the moment laags. It's hilarious how fitting random things can be sometimes. This one doesn't have the "What's your stripper song" question though :P Tara='ako si M16' XD as they say "benta, pare!" haha lol, peace dear :P

Directions: Open your choice of music player and put it on SHUFFLE. Press PLAY. For every question, type the song thats on. When you go to a new question press the next button.

Opening Credits: "Hands Open" by Snow Patrol
"It's not as easy as willing it all to be right. Gotta be more than hoping it's right" Optimism isn't enough anymore. lol :P

Waking Up: "Gone" Switchfoot
"...like summer break is gone, like saturday is gone." ...Waking up on a monday ;p slightly lethargic feel to the song haha... plus, the long twitchy intro with the confused level mixes is sort of like the first thirty minutes of my day.. spent in and out of consciousness.

Average Day: "Miles apart" Yellowcard
"Now we've all grown up, gone on and moved away. Nothing I can do about it, nothing I can say" ...says the college junior. Shit. scary thought.

First Date: "Goodbye to you" Michelle Branch
"Of all the things I believed in. I just want to get it over with" ... bad first date huh? lol xp

Falling In Love: "Head Over Feet" Alanis Morisette

"You've already won me over in spite of me" ... dili na lang ko mu comment.. -.-;

Fightscene: "Seasons of Love" Stevie Wonder/Rent Cast
"...In times that he cried, in the bridges he burned or the way that she died!" <-- only violent bit in the song lol...uh.. broadway musical sing off!! xp

Breaking Up: "Ava Adore" Smashing Pumpkins
"We must never be apart".. someones getting dumped :P slightly depraved quality to the music.. hmmm :P

Getting Back Together: "Feel it" Blackeyed Peas
O.o neh?

Secret Love: "Wouldn't it be nice" Beach boys

"...And wouldn't it be nice to live together In the kind of world where we belong" hahaha warm fuzzy feelings abound ! lolz :D

Life's Okay: "What I believe" Sum 41

"I guess that's just what I believe" optimitstic cop-out. lol I guess I do believe that lifes okay :P

Mental Breakdown: "Grow old with you" Adam Sandler
Hahaha! Love destroys all logcal thought process. And then you go and throw senility into the mix :P lulz..

Driving: "Maybe it's just me" Butch Walker - A lot like love OST
I can imagine warbling this song with friends as you speed down SLEX on a starry more than less sabog roadtrip night :P

Learning a Lesson: "Looking for a Wall" Smahmouth
"So kill your T.V. and kill your phone Be quiet and be alone with you" I like this. Sometimes we just need to be able to shut ourselves off from all the distractions our senses get flogged by on a daily basis and just learn to be alone with ourselves an our thoughts. Have a conversation with the voices in your head!!! hahaha... :)

Deep Thought: "I can see clearly now" Snuff -Muppets Treasure Island OST
"I can see clearly now the rain is gone, I can see all obstacles in my way" I see the light! Hahaha... hmmm my deep thoughts sound really babaw and happy though lolz..

Flashback: "I've Got A Dark Alley And A Ba" FallOut Boy
Haha, one of their non-mainstream songs :D kacha!! "..force a smile, baby's half dead, from comparing myself to everyone else around me" self-concious MH days :P

Partying: "relaxmusic" Ryan
By party I assume you mean the kickass ones that I hold in my head. Strictly RSVP you understand ;p

Happy Dance: "Chelsea Dagger" The Fratellis
"Dohdadoododahdohdodadohdadoo, do, dodahdododahdodahdoh!!! ... 3x" need I say more? :D

Ok, so the secret's out, I'm a sneaky devil. Lol.

Regretting: "Bad Day" Daniel Powter
Strangely enough this is actually one of my happy songs. The music video is adorable. :) The vibe I get from this song is sort of like, "Awww, that sucked...screw it. lalala" Regret isn't something to dwell on. :)

Long Night Alone: "Buloy" Parokya ni Edgar
Hmmmm... happy go lucky as a front for hella depressed... sounds familiar. yuck emo moment. Shet... suicide song O.o;

Death Scene: "When You're around" Motion city soundtrack

"...I can't f*cking stand it, when you're around..." hmmm not my death scene apparently... *holds chainsaw in a contemplative manner*

Closing Credits: "You live, you learn" Alanis Morisette

atay. char ba -.-; where did I get this??

Note to self...

...
Read accounting: to make sure I don't maintain retard status in the mind of my french seatmate
Read Polsci: cuz Sir Baddiri is annoying and I want to one up him
Review chinese: in order to uphold my honor as a cai laoshi de xuesheng
Organize my quarter of the room: so I can move again
Read making money: because I need my fix
Download PHB 4.0: and try to twink my cleric
Sketch: to up happiness levels
Download junjou theme: becuase its retardedly happy
Dance the makarena: just to freak my roommate out

short list of things to do, made for the sake of eating up time while I wait for a lull in the rain- my signal to make a mad dash back to the dorm where proper posts about my weekend (which was uber awesome thank-you-very-much) After I do the first 4 things on the list cuz those are kinda important. :P

Look! a lull!!! *quick post and runs away*






Labo...

No guts no glory...

...though really, there has to be something more awe inspiring than someones intestinal tract.
but what can you do? I set a pasive aggressive trap a couple of posts back. Now I've fallen into one myself. And at this point, so have you. You'll understand later... I apologize.

---

Statistically speaking, unless you are a total hermit, a social retard, or ugly as a putrid bum, there is at least one person in your multiply network that has a crush on you, wants to date you, wants to sleep with you, or simply just wants to kiss you.

So... let's play "No Guts, No Glory!"

The rules are simple.

1. If you want to date the person who posted this, send a Personal Message, not a reply to this post, saying "Coffee?"
2. If you have a crush on the person who posted this, send a Personal Message saying "You're hot!"
   
3. If you just want to sleep with them & stay friends, send them a message that says "Nice shoes!"
4. If you simply just wants to kiss the person who posted this, send a Personal Message saying, "I do!"
   

SCARED?

The only rule is that, you must not make anyone who sends you a personal message feel stupid for feeling that way about you. Acknowledge. Say thank you. Move on.

IF YOU'VE READ THIS, YOU HAVE TO REPOST THIS, EVEN IF YOU'RE TAKEN & see who replies.

SO... re-post this as "No Guts, No Glory", as it doesn't matter if you're married, in a relationship, or single. You opened it so you HAVE to repost it! A test of your bravery...

C'mon! No Guts, No Glory! :D

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------

As a self proclaimed social retard, the only thing that'll come of this post is that a bunch of people'll get kinda tagged, possibly annoyed, or maybe amused.

----

I need sleep again...

The Gani bear...

...lumbers towards the back of her cave and pauses in front of an irregular shape protruding from behind a mass of vines that have long since established themselves as a rather permanent type of wallpaper. The old mirror's corner pokes out from under the growth and deftly, with pinky claw extended, she pulls aside the plant's twiney weed arms, freeing the mirror from the vege embrace. The mirror's surface has lost its lustre in the battle with mold and a strange unnamed funggus whos cap resembles a squishy corkscrew. And long scratches run down the one straight edge, from when the mirror had first been dragged into her cave through the forest from the wreckage of a gypsy cart. (violent things happen when a mule's sensitive nose is subjected to the equally violent smell of unwashed gypsy underpants). The gani-bear huddles up to the mirror, her cold nose almost touching the glass as she squints at herself; trying to spot the difference.

There is none.

Struck by the feeling of anti-climax the gani-bear plops down on her fluffy bear bum and purses her lips (which the mirror showed her, was a rather peculiar expression on a bear.) Then she shrugs her shoulders gets up and finishes the insane amount of homework for a first day back to school.

I remember mom saying once that I was born at 2o'clock in the morning. That was exactly 18 years ago :) Happy Birthday to me! nyarharhar. I've just hit a major milestone but I'm a bit too swamped with stuff to appreciate it right now I guess. Haven't slept more than 3 hours in the last 22, and I had 7 and a half hours of consecutive classes. Crazy schedules, planning an outing, finding out my philosophy 101 is in TAGALOG (I almost cried. no shit... DEFINITELY have to load rev), making an idiot out of myself (me and my social retard tendencies) side projects and hoho my teachers decide to give me homework in lieu of a birthday present. Cheap bastards. I guess the numbness from that could explain the lack of a "WOAAOW IM EIGHTEEN!! O.O" vibe.

Then again, it could be that nothing has changed. I mean, i can legally vote, drink, drive, get married, be tried as an adult. But I'm still me.

It sounds char but its kinda boring :P I was so ready for something mighty and all powerful to pop out of my belly button and give me super powers.

...

I need sleep.